Football Catharsis

Now that the NFL playoffs are over, I find myself questioning my football loyalties. Growing up in the NFL no-man's land of Hartford there was no real compelling choice. As far as we were concerned, the Patriots may as well not have existed. Due to a combination of blackouts, distribution deals (or lack thereof), and other factors, they were rarely on TV in the area making getting to know the team in a family not exactly football crazed very difficult.

What we did get a heaping helping of every Sunday was the New York Football Giants. And there was NO way I was going to support a team from New York. So when I was in first grade, my dad went on a business trip to Washington DC, and happened to be eating one night in a restaurant which happened to be owned by one Joe Theisman, who happened to be there that night. My dad, recognizing him, went up to ask for his autograph for his young son (who at the time had no idea who Theisman was, incidentally).

"Of course," Joe said, and snapped his fingers (or at least that's how dad tells it), causing a waitress to appear out of nowhere with a cart of 8x10 black and white glossys of Joe, posed kneeling next to his helmet. Theisman dutifully signed the photo, making it out to me, and my dad returned from his trip with an unexpected souvenir for me.

"Of course," Joe said, and snapped his fingers...

From that point on, and through the better part of the next 15 years, my dad and I were Redskins fans. At least you knew you'd see them at least twice (when they played the Jints) on TV. And I have to say, that worked out pretty well for us with three superbowls won during that time.

Then came the late 90's and my faith wavered. The team became less likable, with punk players making stupid decisions (headbutting the stadium wall, for example), got a thoroughly unlikable owner, and I drifted into the Patriots camp almost without realizing it. Sure, I'd watch when they were on TV, but for the most part I followed the Pats because living in Boston, it's impossible not to since Bledsoe arrived.

I was always careful to point out to people that the Patriots were not REALLY my team, but as a New Englander I was happy to see them do well and certainly didn't DISlike them. But I never once called myself a fan because, as a die-hard Red Sox fan, I always resented the bandwagon fans who are everywhere nowadays. I was somehow afraid that true Patriots fans would find me out, as I always try to test Red Sox fans I talk to to see how long they've REALLY been following the team. "Who played third base for the Sox in 2004?" "What catch is Tom Brunansky famous for?" Because everyone likes a winner. Following a team when they're NOT winning is the true test of being a fan. Like not winning for 86 years.

So I now feel somewhat guilty, almost unfaithful that I've allowed myself to be sucked into turbine of the Patriots hype machine over the last several years. And I'm feeling more guilty that it took a LOSS to make me realize what has happened to me. I take team loyalty very seriously, and I don't honestly feel that I can claim to be a true fan of either team. So what am I to do now?

It's almost too late, but I think I need to return to my roots, and focus on the Redskins. Hopefully they'll have me back.